Focus

I’ll be 45 soon.

Given my comorbidities, it’s a safe bet to say I’m over half-way done.

It is simultaneously self-deprecating and egotistical to say that I am good-to-very-good at a large number of things, and I am interested in even more. My personal interests and professional experience runs the gamut, and I have reached a point financially in my career beyond the wildest dreams of the 16-year-old who used to work three jobs.

I am not limited to merely adulting- I can actually parent a decent bit, too.

I am all these things, but also prone to bouts of existential dread. It’s not so much the cliche of “What is the point of it all?”; it’s more “Who should I be”?

Should I continue to run down all these avenues until one of them magically transports me to where I want to be? Or should a pick a direction and run hard, even if it doesn’t scratch all the itches and might not ever be more than an interest?

My historical idols were DaVinci and Ben Franklin. As scattered as either of them might have been, I doubt either one of them spent wasted time building an ultimate 90s Hip Hop playlist in Apple Music. They probably didn’t spend much time searching for their perfect EDC loadout or bag.

I’ve been living the double-whammy of elevating the system above the work and defining myself by what I want to do rather than by what I am doing.

It’s time to simplify and discard, to take care of myself, my family, and my home.

#blog
#life